In the most general sense, a nesting arrangement is one where the children remain in the family home while the divorcing parents take turns living in the family home and in another location. In some of my previous blogs, I have covered the basics of nesting arrangements including what nesting actually means in the co-parenting sense and some common logistical considerations. It is an option that sometimes gains popularity in the media when used in celebrity divorces. When this happens, I often see an increase in clients wondering whether nesting is more of a fad for celebrities, or if the arrangement can actually work. Although every family is different, nesting can be beneficial in many situations. Continue Reading
Articles Tagged with separation
Can I Afford to Get Divorced? The Importance of Understanding Your Marital Finances Prior to Divorce
Prenups, Post-nups and Separation Agreements are used to address finances and other issues concerning marital rights and obligations. As I have written in the past, prenuptial agreements are an opportunity for couples to have comprehensive discussions about each partner’s finances leading up to the wedding. Additionally, prenups provide an opportunity for the couple to navigate the financial path they would like to take during the marriage. Similarly, post-nuptial agreements afford couples the opportunity to have conversations about finances during the marriage. If a couple is contemplating divorce and has not executed a pre or post-nuptial agreement, a Separation Agreement can be negotiated. A Separation Agreement is a very detailed written contract that you and your spouse voluntarily sign without involving the court. It addresses all of the financial and other issues of the marriage. Continue Reading
Claiming Social Security Benefits after a Divorce
The divorce process includes negotiating a plan for what will happen to assets and debt as well as the support needs of the family. There are many misconceptions about how social security benefits may be claimed after a divorce. Outlined below are some of the most common misconceptions about social security benefits for ex-spouses and general information on how the process works. Continue Reading
Reconcilable Differences: Using a Fact-Based Approach to Separation and Divorce
There is a distinction between irreconcilable and reconcilable differences when it comes to separation and divorce. The focus of this article is on the reconcilable ones. When the relationship changes to a point where there will be a separation and divorce, there are certain issues that need to be addressed so that both parties can financially disentangle and move on with their lives. Emotional disentanglement takes time. When there are children, emotions can be purposefully directed to a cooperative parenting plan so that the children can benefit from the qualities that each parent brings to the family. For more on co-parenting agreements, please see my article entitled: Co-parenting, Where do I start? Continue Reading
Considerations for Choosing an Attorney
When initiating the divorce process, selecting the right attorney may seem challenging and stressful. Finding someone who aligns with your process choice and objectives can help the process move more smoothly. Just as there are different process choices for your divorce, there are different attorney styles. Having a consultation with an experienced family law attorney helps to determine whether the attorney has the requisite experience for your matter and whether he or she will conduct the negotiations in a way that comports you’re your intentions and goals.
There is not a one-size-fits-all approach when it comes to a legal matter, including divorce. Parties should ideally agree on the process that will promote a mutually beneficial outcome. In working toward that goal, finding the “right” attorney is also an important decision. In choosing an attorney, some of the considerations that clients can keep in mind are outlined below.
The Effect of COVID-19 on Elements of a Separation and Divorce
When parties initiate the divorce process, there are certain major issues that need to be addressed in coming to a final agreement. These issues include the distribution of property and debt, support (spousal and child, if applicable), health insurance, and custody and parenting arrangements. With the Coronavirus affecting many areas of daily life, some of these common divorce issues may become more complicated as parties work through divorce negotiations. Continue Reading
“Marriage Story”: A Mediator’s Take on the Divorce Process
I work with couples that are separating and divorcing so when Noah Baumbach’s film,“Marriage Story” first opened, I was curious and wanted to see it. “Marriage Story” renewed my strong conviction that the best ways to resolve conflict are through mediation and the collaborative law process. This marriage story shows what happens when things moves beyond a party’s control. The line in the film that stood out the most to me was: “You are fighting for something you don’t even want.” One striking moment in the film was the literal tug of war between the parents and the child. The parents in the film clearly love their son but their choices about how to resolve their dispute lead them down a difficult path to resolution.
What follows are some of the lessons to be learned from “Marriage Story”: Continue Reading
Prenups in New York: The Basic Facts
A prenuptial agreement is a written contract between two people that is entered into before marriage and takes effect upon marriage. This document has become more popular as couples realize the importance of clarifying expectations and setting a good foundation for communication about finances (and other issues) before the marriage.
Each couple has a unique set of goals and issues to be addressed and the prenup can be specifically tailored with that in mind. Without a prenup, state laws dictate who owns the property acquired during the marriage as well as what happens upon the dissolution of the marriage.
Why get a Prenup? Continue Reading
Putting the Children First: How the Collaborative Law and Mediation Process Can Help in Separation and Divorce
Divorce impacts many aspects of the parties’ lives, including parenting. Whether the conflict surrounding a separation and/or divorce is high or low, the children need to remain a priority in the decision-making that must take place. Two processes for divorce encourage healthy ways of co-parenting. This article addresses the benefits of collaborative divorce and mediation as they relate to children. In both processes, the focus is on what will work moving forward and negativity is discouraged. This promotes a healthier transition for the children to their new normal. I have outlined some of the benefits below.
Collaborative divorce and mediation may provide a healthier way to address the needs of the children.
Both the collaborative divorce and mediation processes are intended to be non-adversarial. Rather than a contentious “winner take all” approach, these processes allow for the parties to work together to create mutually beneficial settlements. Although the divorce process is often stressful and it may be difficult for parties to work together, the professionals encourage respectful dialogue and a cooperative, problem-solving approach rather than an adversarial one. Trained professionals are employed in each process to help facilitate the discussions and keep settlement meetings productive. Because the goal of each process is to reach a mutually beneficial settlement, the negotiations are then able to focus on the needs of the children and how the parties can provide for those needs post-divorce. The goal is to keep the children out of the middle.
Co-Parenting: Where Do I Start?
Moms and Dads that choose mediation or collaborative law usually want to create a stable, healthy environment as the family reconfigures during a separation and divorce. A well thought out parenting plan helps children and parents move forward in a positive way. Continue Reading