Couples that select mediation are often looking for 3 things: 1) fairness, 2) to make their own decisions, and 3) a more economical way to reach resolution of their marital and family situation. Fairness: Even in a high-conflict situation, most couples are seeking fairness. While it may be difficult to…
Divorce and custody disputes are often material for tabloid front pages. Celebrity splits never seem to fall out of favor in the media, even though there are alternative and appropriate dispute resolution methods designed to minimize the hostility. Headlines for years have centered on Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie –…
I recently read a New York Times article addressing the growing trend of multigenerational households and the benefits of a so-called ‘prenup’ for this type of homeownership. The reasons for a contractual arrangement about home ownership for families can range from financial considerations to the added support in raising young…
Many parents come to mediation wanting a 50/50 parenting schedule. That usually means that both parents are concerned about maintaining a strong relationship with the children once Mom and Dad separate. Shared parenting is usually a positive experience when the parents cooperate to create a workable plan that respects the…
Is civility in our society spiraling downward? It often feels like that nowadays. This does not have to be the case in our families and in our own circles of colleagues and friends if we pay attention to how we are engaging in the resolution of different points of view. …
The answer is a resounding Yes! There are many reasons why consulting attorneys help to create durable, practical agreements through the mediation process. What follows is a summary of the positive effects of using consulting attorneys: 1. Informed Decision-Making: Consultation during the mediation process with an experienced family lawyer can…
The Russian film Loveless, directed by Andrey Zvyagintsev, is an intense, provocative drama that can be viewed on many levels. It is a comment on what happens when a marriage breaks down as well as a critique of modern Russian society. I found that there were aspects of the story…
How can words or minor interpersonal tensions lead to major trauma and in some cases national trauma? As a conflict professional, I am constantly intrigued by the power of words, actions and inaction. An act or expression may or may not be intended to cause harm. Even in a close-knit…
Last week a ‘talking stick’ reportedly broke the stalemate over the government shutdown. Just what is a talking stick and how can it be used as a means of working through impasse in a negotiation? According to my research, American Indian (First Nation) tribes have used the talking stick for…
Does Blame help reach a result in the negotiation process? In my opinion, it is counter-productive. This week we saw a lot of blame coming out of Washington D.C., in a negotiation without resolution and an eventual shut down. This led me to think about my own work and what…